Tag Archives: graditude

Loving over judging – Why do we compare?

organ and tissue donation

“The more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. Dali Lama

So why do we compare? Does it give us an opportunity to justify our own actions? Or perhaps make us feel worthier than our counterpart or even more so– to separate ourselves from others.  We all judge on some level and some more than others.  Families can often be the worse. We are often programmed to compete, to compare, and criticize and it can cycle through to the next generation.

How can we stop this behaviour? First, we need to be aware of our thoughts and what is going on within ourselves. We often judge others simply because of our own personal experiences.  Haven’t you had times in your life when you were extremely good and other times when you were not nice, maybe even terrible?

If we can have the awareness that in life, sometimes we are up and other times we are down. And that life is like a wave of not just our emotions, but also based on our experiences in this world. Perhaps we would be less inclined to point the finger at others. Why must we judge so harshly, particularly when change is constant within all of us?

I love this quote  “Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease“. Dali Lama

So true, it takes energy to be angry, to repeat your stories and think negatively. While it gives us energy to care for others and to be grateful for what we have.

You and I are in control of our emotions in any given situation. Why not choose loving over judging?

Wendy ~

 

 

 

Lesson’s learned from donating a kidney…

If you have read my posts since the beginning, you know how donating my kidney has impacted my life. This particular journey continues for me; however to date here are the lessons learned over the past five months since the donation…. 

Lesson one- Giving my kidney to my brother is never a good time, but absolutely the right time in my life.

Lesson two- Truly understanding compassion. The problems that one is facing are small compared to saving a life. Look in the eyes of those you love and don’t run.

Lesson three- Then the miracle sets in and you are actually saving your own life. Broken open, seeing more clearly.

Lesson four -Broken glass, looking in the mirror and not seeing your life’s path and trusting not to look for a quick fix, just allow it to unfold. God’s plan is bigger than yours could possibly be.

Lesson five -Just stop. Feel, listen, don’t judge, be present. Life happens and it’s all about how we choose to manage the present moment.

Lesson six. – How do you move forward and continue to stay mindful?  Back to lesson five.

Lesson seven – Pay attention to your gut! It may start screaming at you and this time listen and trust in yourself

Lesson eight – Finding my spine, confronting those who are close to you in a clear and loving way.

Lesson nine – Finding love for myself,  this is  my biggest lesson. I always felt that choosing love over fear meant doing the right thing for someone else. I’ve since learned it means doing the right thing for yourself.

Lesson ten – Being vs. doing regardless of the consequences. Not always easy, not always safe but definitely worth it! Follow your passion, follow what brings you joy.

Rochester, Charlotte, Pittsburgh, Los Angeles,  Japan, back to NY – home at last.  Truthfully — home is you, you are home….

And always knowing that this too will pass.

With gratitude! Wendy